DIY D-hall Recipes

Do you love Pinterest? Do you hate the hot food line? Well here are some bad recipes that you can make yourself with the ingredients D-Hall provides.

D-Hall Mac and Cheese

“Great for crying into” -Peabody Hall

Ingredients:

the weird shredded salad cheese

whatever noodles there are

Directions:

Wiggle through the hockey players in line to grab a bowl. Fill that bowl with noodles. Put the cheese on top. Microwave and stir. Tastes great with a side of loss of self respect because you’re eating microwaved noodles.

Chicken Salad Pain

“Like regular chicken salad, but with a hint of grief.” -Prep Rep Arielle Lui

Ingredients:

chicken salad

bread (pain)

pain (pain)

Directions:

Put a dollop of chicken salad on a slice of bread. Sprinkle it with your salty tears (to taste). If you’re in too good a mood to cry into your sandwich, I suggest thinking about your future.

Szechuan Sweet and Sour Chicken

“It’s more food dye than sauce, but it’ll do.” -New York Times food critic Lily Hicks

Ingredients:

1 cell phone

ca$h

Directions:

Walk into D-hall. Look at the hot food line and cry. Go back to your dorm. Call Szechuan and order Sweet and Sour Chicken.

Blood of Your Enemies

“Your daily source of protein”-Browning

Ingredients:

full dining hall

butter knife

Directions:

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Prep Spring

“Ice cream breakfast, lunch AND dinner!”

Ingredients:

ice cream

bowl/mug/cone/open mouth

Directions:

Grab the largest container you can. Put as much as cream as you can in container. Feel the effects of eating nothing but ice cream during this 24/7 dairy heaven.