Preps Coin Term ‘Stillwell’s and Chill’

EXETER, NH.—According to our Prep Posse insider, there is a new slang term circulating about the plebian prep class. This phrase, “Stillwell’s and Chill,” is strikingly similar to the newly-popular innuendo-ridden terms “Netflix and Chill,” “Hulu and Relax,” or “Youtube Clip and Deep Breath.” Although the term “Stillwell’s and Chill” was just recently coined, the tradition of purchasing Stillwell’s ice cream and then taking what is most likely not a platonic walk down Swayze has been in existence since the Founding Fathers themselves were jaded four-year seniors at the Academy. It is hypothesized that they, too, created catchy terms such as “Chilled Cream and Ankle,” to sum up what happened during that infamous walk down Swayze with a member of the opposite sex, although the History Department has yet to comment on this subject.

Regardless, there has been an increasing amount of concern regarding the volume of underclassmen occupying Swayze during the hours of the evening to “Stillwell’s and Chill,” particularly from upperclassmen who not only think of themselves as experts in “Stillwell’s and Chill,” but believe that all preps should be considered out of bounds and be put in timeout immediately if found outside of their dorm room or Agora during any hour of the day. The majority of the faculty also echo this concern, as they do not believe the preps that they have been entrusted with are ready yet for “Stillwell’s and Chill.”

“A food baby is not the only thing you can go home with after an intense session of Stillwell’s and Chill,” one concerned health teacher said, “and preps who have not yet experienced the joys of spring term health class are not prepared to simply go out and ‘Stillwell’s and Chill’ with whomever they please.”

According to the office of the honorable Dr. Lisa “Yung Money” MacFarlane, Stillwells has been alerted of the influx of minors attempting to do what is now called “Stillwell’s and Chill,” and will begin to take preventative measures such as IDing young teens who look like they belong in day care as opposed to the prep class.

The impact of this is yet to be determined, but with the destruction of Evening Prayer as a popular first date destination, more students than ever are turning to Swayze to try out this trend of “Stillwell’s and Chill,” and only time will tell whether the administration will be able to curb this new trend.

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