Mr. Hassan's Bucket List

In a recent interview with Exonian humor, principal Hassan shared with us his bucket list, the things he wants to get accomplished with his time left at the academy. He did this in good faith hoping we would keep it private, but we couldn’t help but share his rest of year dreams with you:

- Try wearing a funky plaid blazer to faculty meetings

-Make student body buy more Apple stuff

-Forget principal’s day

-Get Kim Jong Un to speak at assembly

-Mandatory jean shorts day for all guys

-Put blue Gatorade in a Windex bottle, and walk around campus spraying into mouth

-Draw mustaches on portraits in Assembly Hall

-Skydive into halftime at the fall E/A football game

-Try to fly by jumping off J.Smith roof with cardboard wings (Note: ask physics department about more viable wing materials)

-Change motto to sibi

-Write name in wet cement

-Make my own lip-synced “What Does the Fox Say?” music video

-Organize a flash mob pillow fight

-Have a tea party

-Build up the courage to wear my chubbies

-Slide down Soule beach in a cardboard box

-Finish season 6 of Gossip Girl

-Restructure biology classes: replace evolution with Greek Mythology and Scientology

-Fill water balloons with paint and surprise students between classes

-Write “Tom wuz heer” in the small room above assembly hall and on the side of the powder house

-Be the first First Gentleman of the United States of America

If you have the opportunity to help Mr. Hassan achieve any of these goals, take some time to make your principal's year.