Prep Posse: A Guide
Prep Posse: the coolest group of people who will ever walk the hallowed paths of Phillips Exeter Academy. With every fall comes a new group of preps and a new generation of prep posse. The term has just begun, so it's prime posse joining time.
Everyone knows prep posse is made up of the raddest kids in the prep class. But how do you get there? Who decides which lucky youngster gets to roll with this crowd? Lucky for you, we at the Humor Page take prep posse really seriously, and we love giving preps really awesome advice. If you want to make it into prep posse, just stick with me, kid. I'll take you places. (Non-preps, if you're lucky, and you follow these tips, you too, may be able to walk among the select, the cool, the prep posse).
1. Refer to yourself as the "good adjective" prep. Everyone knows you're a prep, and other preps will be impressed if non-preps know you as the "good adjective prep." For example, write for the Humor Page and be known as the "funny" prep. Join the chess or math team and be known as the "jocky" prep. When your fellow preps talk to non-preps about you, they'll realize that non-preps don't bother with names of preps, and will take note of your recognition amongst the older kids.
2. Hang out in Grill. All the time. You know that scene in Mean Girls where Cady is at the mall water fountain and compares it to a watering hole? That's Grill. Grill is the social hub of the Academy and anybody who is anybody will be sure to spend all of their time there. Other potential prep posse members will be there and it's important for them to know you're not a total loser. Bonus points if you spend all of meetings/unifree hanging over some other preps and being super loud about how much homework you have.
3. Use social media to your advantage. The internet is a powerful place, and what better use of it than to further your own popularity? Facebook is a pretty solid choice of social media campaigning. Be sure to friend as many Academy students as you can. Who cares if one of them graduated in 1960? It's one more friend than the prep next to you has! Support your fellow preps on the internet by commenting genuine/original/flattering things on their profile pictures like "ZOMG ILYSM YOUR SO HOT WILL YOU SHARE SOME PLz???!!! <3" Remember to remain humble when another potential prep of the posse flatters you over the internet. Remind them that "OMG but I'll stop being HOT when YOU stop, luv ya!"
4. Be an EP stud. The best way an Exonian can show a fellow Exonian s/he is interested in them is by taking them to the totally romantic and low-key Evening Prayer. Now remember, prep relationships are sensitive, fragile and fickle, so you can't ask your potential posse date directly. You must get another prep to set you up. To show your loyalty to the posse, be sure to set your friends up for EP dates as well. Not only does it show you care, but it shows you know a lot of people and care about what really matters: whose arm goes around another person's for a glorious half an hour.
5. Be aware of prep posse. Everyone in your grade, heck, everyone in the school, is striving to become a member of the class of 2018 prep posse. That means you need to know who's in and who's out. Like romantic relationships, the members of the posse aren't very permanent at the beginning of the year. One week, the kid in your bio class might be in the group chat, and faster than you can say "is it week one or week two," that kid won't be invited on your next Stillwell's run. That being said, beware of those who say they are of the posse. Only true prep posse members can identify one another, so don't let yourself be distracted.
There you have it. This is all of the gold the Humor Page could give you on how to make it into what some people (read: everyone) consider a Exeter's Hottest Clique. Good luck, and remember: prep posse 4 ever.