Life at Exeter as an International Student
By LUKE CHON ‘28
I was first made aware of the concept of preparatory schools by a family friend. Having lived in Tokyo since birth, he had made the transition a few years prior and would visit home annually to speak of the wide-ranging academic coursework, the stellar opportunities to form a network of powerful human connections, and the pure excitement of the residential lifestyle. His praises were glorified and exaggerated at times, attentively noting the parental audience who clung onto to his every word, yet, nonetheless, I was inclined to chart a similar path. I applied to Exeter my eighth grade year and the later discovery of my acceptance was of great shock and jubilation. After nine years of attending the same international school settled in the heart of Tokyo, I would soon make the transition I had envisioned myself completing since youth. Yet, two months into the academic school year, several conclusions can now be drawn. How does life as an international Exonian compare to that of those local?
I arrived on campus as a participant of the International Student Orientation (ISO), an event hosted by the Academy for students with long international transits flying to Exeter. For many, ISO makes up the bulk of their precursory impressions of life on campus. Trips to the Hilltop Fun Center and a nearby Target were highlights of a three-day program where students met and interacted with others representing all corners of the globe. I relished the opportunity, attempting to replicate the connections my family friend had mused of years past, and it was enriching: diverse languages were heard throughout the program, students congregated to elaborate on their former schooling environments, and we, as international students, rejoiced at the sight of Target’s seemingly endless inventory.
However, the ISO event, for many, can be felt as an illusion of sorts, blurring the various facets of true campus reality. Aside from the words ‘Hilltop,’ ‘Fun,’ and ‘Center,’ never being brought up together again, ISO seared an image of a thriving, vibrant, international community that has died down since the commencement of the all-student orientation. It cemented a false understanding of the true depth of the international student body (a fraction of the entire school population), bringing closure and a sense of improbability to the prospect of ever reshaping the tight circle of international kids forged on day one. While a recent reunion and a variety of affinity groups and clubs exist beyond our classes of instruction, it has been far from the sense of comfort achieved during the event. In many ways, ISO seeded within us a naiveness about the international diaspora at Exeter, and the lack of relatability now pervasive in my classes, which largely amass with students from local states and cities, has been almost overwhelming to shoulder and adapt to.
First day icebreakers introducing myself as “I’m from Tokyo” and the follow-up of that being a long trip or whether I was competent in the Japanese language became frequent occurrences, questions I had little practice answering having been raised in a community replete with natives and other international kids. These introductions unearthed deeper complications. My Korean family living in Japan was surprising for many. Questions as simplistic as “but don’t Koreans hate the Japanese” surprised me, momentarily, as I had grown up embracing my dual cultures and for those around me to comprehend this with relatability as well. I had grown up learning Japanese, with Japanese friends, and in Japanese neighborhoods thriving with international life. I had never once questioned why I attended an international school, why my education was so heavily filtered on topics pertinent to the Western world or how this concept could be possibly foreign to others. In a greater context, it is undoubtedly feasible for there to be questions, considering the spectrum of upbringings range variably among students; it is only the shift in culture that has been an unfamiliar sensation to grapple with at first.
The stance of being an international student has brought along with it additional issues one does not fully take into account during the application process. The obvious and already implied struggles were preemptively registered, yet no one really confronts them until they prove to be true. Things like homesickness, a longing for authentic cultural foods, and a sheer lack of alone time to unwind that was once provided with living with family have settled in awkwardly. In addition, the international student weighs the stressors of what to do during week-long breaks and the costs it takes to fund trips back-and-forth, problems that could be simply resolved by a car or Uber for locals.
Despite this, Exeter has nonetheless been abundant in thrills, acting as a liminal space to transcend as thinkers and members of such a rigorous and academically competitive institution. While there have been many struggles that have initially stumped me in my debut term at Exeter, I, along with others, have learned ways to curb them. Whether that be through snacks reminiscent of home or online phone call exchanges with my family members, Exeter has been an illuminating and enjoyable experience thus far, and this first trimester will be remembered for years to come.
