Getting Over Homesickness
We’ve been back at school for a brief amount of time. For some students, this is their first experience living away from home. As a person who suffered from severe homesickness last year, I can tell you that you are not alone; it affects nearly 70 percent of all people who have been away from home.
Homesickness, the distress which is caused by spending time away from home or a familiar environment, especially prevails in younger children and adolescents, who have not spent much time away from their parents or environments for extended periods. Though the affects of homesickness vary from person to person, common triggers usually center around the length of time spent away from home, a greater distance between home and a new location, and the unfamiliarity of a new environment. Anxiety may set in even if someone has been away from home before; you may have gone to summer camp for several weeks at a time, but at boarding school, you may be away from your family for a much longer period.
The very best cure, however, is getting outside your dorm room and doing other pursuits.
It can be combated, though. Most of the time, homesickness recedes after a while. If it must go away quickly, the best way to get rid of it is to trick yourself into thinking differently. With positive thinking, a person can lessen the sadness they feel when thinking of home, and accentuate the excitement or happiness they feel in a new place. By reframing your sense of time you can make a length of time seem shorter and breaks come faster. You can also count your blessings. By counting your blessings, you are more likely to focus on the good things about your new environment rather than the good things at home.
The very best cure, however, is getting outside your dorm room and doing other pursuits. Some activities, such as making friends, are very good ways to kick homesickness, as they provide you not only with a reason to stop thinking negatively, but also function as a support system for you if you ever feel lonely or depressed. Other activities, such as going to dances or eating Stilwells ice cream, are places you can go to make friends or to solidify friendships. Make sure you experience all the aspects of Exeter’s campus; the things you do in the very first weeks of your year at Exeter will frame how you feel for the rest of the year, and if you catch yourself feeling negatively about Exeter, you can think back on the fun you had at the beginning.
Of course, not everyone gets over homesickness right away. Environmental factors, age and stress can impact how homesick a person feels. Other mental health issues, too, can lead to heightened feelings of homesickness. If a severe case of homesickness begins after a person arrives at Exeter, and does not subside in a few weeks, it is best to go to the health center and discuss your symptoms with the the caring and capable staff. It may mean that there are other underlying factors leading to severe homesickness.
Your homesickness may not go away entirely until you return home. Though I was extremely grateful to go home over Thanksgiving, I missed my friends at Exeter and truly wanted to return. My homesickness went away completely during the first two weeks of winter term, once I had realized that I loved Exeter more than than I realized.
Homesickness is a normal part of life. At some point, everyone longs to go home and play with a pet, or eat better food than is served at D-hall. However, homesickness does go away with the more experience and ease a person feels at Exeter. Have fun here, and the sadness will go away.