Exonians, Please Stop Complaining

Exonians love to complain. The strange desire that Exonians seem to have to broadcast and amplify their own sadness, to need to be more stressed and unhappy than all of their peers in a twisted misery-olympics is well acknowledged on campus. We all seem to find some sick satisfaction from being more overworked, more miserable and more unhappy than our peers, like that somehow makes us tougher and better than those around us. We seem to find ways to hate everything about Exeter, from the noisy heating system to the formerly dilapidated cage. I myself am guilty of this, complaining about anything and everything I can think of, such as the lack of kale crisps in the Wetherell salad bar. And yet, every break I find myself feeling a deep longing for campus. I dream of lazy days on the quad in the spring, late night Chinese food with my dorm, the sense of purpose my classes and my extracurriculars give me. This is especially amplified by the length and idleness of my summer break. I know I’m not alone in this. Many of my friends also feel this longing and love for the campus we all call home when we’re away. This school year, we should all carry this affection with us when we return to campus and eliminate the culture of misery we have cultivated thus far.

There will be the sweet relief that comes after hours spent pouring over a paper, when finally, everything is complete.

Exeter has its flaws. Certain events of this summer have made that all too evident. To love and appreciate the school and institution that binds members of our community together does not mean ignoring that which we don’t like about it. Yes, life at Exeter is stressful at times. Yes, D-hall food isn’t the same as a home cooked meal. That doesn’t change the fact that every member of our community benefits from being a part of it. We students especially are lucky to have access to the resources afforded by Exeter, to be surrounded by a community of passionate individuals, to be guided by some of the strongest minds in the world among other things. In our constant complaining and need to be sadder than the rest of our fellow students, we not only make each other’s Exeter experiences more miserable, but also disrespect the generosity of those who have made our experience possible and take our gifts for granted. We can recognize aspects of our lives that at Exeter that we don’t like as much without disparaging the institution as a whole. Indeed, we should be striving to improve our school and the culture that binds us because of our love for the Academy rather than in spite of it. Rather than sitting around and complaining about how awful everything is and how much everything sucks, we should remember the attachment many of us feel towards Exeter, and channel that love of our academy and the frustrations we feel towards its shortcomings into positive change.

As any year at Exeter can be, this upcoming year may be tough. There will be late nights and early mornings, papers and tests and projects all joining together in a perfect storm of misery. There will be nights when we feel hopeless or empty. There may even be moments when we feel absolute fury due to the shortcomings of the Academy. However, there will also be hours spent with friends in D-hall or Grill, late-night bubble tea orders and long walks on Swasey. There will be that one golden class that hits the Harkness sweet spot. There will be that one teacher who just gets you. There will be the sweet relief that comes after hours spent pouring over a paper, when finally, everything is complete. There will be tricky readings decoded, tough math problems solved and archenemies defeated. As we navigate the school year ahead, hold on to those sweet moments and cling to the nostalgia we felt over the summer. Exeter isn’t great, but it certainly isn’t all bad. Much of what people find to complain about at school is just in our heads. We like to feel miserable because its something to bond over and something to attack when things go wrong. We deserve a positive experience at the Academy, rather than a cesspool of misery.