Equality and Innovation
My first experience with gender-neutral ideology at Exeter came with my first dorm meeting, the first day of prep year. The dorm faculty asked if anyone had any questions about residential life here at Exeter, and the first words out of my mouth as an Exonian were, “Are co-ed sleepovers allowed?” One can imagine the raucous laughter and applause that followed from the upperclassmen.
Needless to say, I have since learned Exeter is not the most welcoming place for gender neutrality. Certainly, we are open to change. Next year will welcome the first gender neutral bathrooms, where all sorts of delightful awkwardness will occur. Although it’s a strong first step, I’d say the community of Exeter needs to examine more closely the idea of gender neutrality.
Gender neutral dorms? At Exeter? The idea seems ludicrous to some, but why not? I can certainly lie and say that I was trying to be funny with my sleepover comment, but I wouldn’t dare tell anyone I was genuinely being serious. We are supposedly one of the most accepting and diverse communities in the country, if not the world. The Academy, however, is still adamantly grounded in the archaic idea of gender separation. As one of last week’s Assembly speakers pointed out, we are the future, the leaders of our generations, intelligent and mature. Yet are we unable to even fathom the idea of sharing living quarters with the opposite sex?
All students at Exeter command a certain level of decency and respect. How are we supposed to be prepared for the real world, where sex is no longer a limitation, when we can’t accept gender neutrality? If the Academy can’t trust the student body to uphold a certain standard of maturity, Exeter will never take the steps forward it must take to become entirely gender neutral.
Gender neutral dorms are an innovative and great idea. Sexes should be separated by floors, but that is all. A girl visiting the dorm should not have to take four flights of stairs to reach the basement bathroom, which is unattended and frankly, sketchy. I suggest an idea similar to that of an apartment building, where it matters not what the gender of your neighbor is, for you are both humans, and in this case, mature students. In such a building, all the bathrooms are gender neutral, the common rooms are gender neutral, and of course, the faculty represent the diversity of the dorm.
Gender neutral dorms could also help with the V’s policy. In a gender neutral dorm, rooms can be considered as common areas, open to anyone. Visitations will no longer be necessary; instead a simple set of rules similar to the current ones, like open doors and feet on the floor should be in place. Does the Academy assume we will engage in illicit activity any opportunity we can? I like to believe that we are better than that. How can we prove we are mature if we are never given a chance?
If Exeter wishes to maintain its reputation as a diverse and open-minded community, we must address the topic of gender neutrality. Small steps must be taken first, but eventually a discussion must be had on the pros and cons of gender neutral dorms, and when it does, I sincerely hope those in favor of equality and innovation support me.