How to Check Your Email

  1. Open the Outlook app while sitting and waiting for assembly to start so you don’t look like a not busy loser who doesn’t have any friends to talk to.

2. DO NOT CLICK ON ANY LINKS.

3. DO NOT DISCLOSE ANY PERSONAL INFORMATION TO SAID LINKS.

4. DO NOT OPEN THOSE SEVEN EMAILS IN A ROW FROM THE SAME PERSON THAT ARE ALL IDENTICAL AND ASK FOR YOUR USERNAME AND PASSWORD.

5. Immediately delete the daily MUN Canvas notification from Mark Blekherman that you received because you went to one MUN introductory meeting 13 months ago.

6. Scan for “Dickeys!” emails and sigh in relief when you don’t see any and realize that your math teacher didn’t notice you didn’t show up for class two days ago.

7. Delete the “Club News and Notes” email because no one reads it anyway.

8. Screenshot where the hot guy in your math class emailed you back with the homework so you can show all of your friends your *rapidly progressing relationship* and then snap the screenshot to the group chat.

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An Update on the Flora and Fauna of 1998: Full Version

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This Might Not Be a Joke but It Will Definitely Make You Feel Like One!