Overenrolled!

Blessings and thanks to the good Lord for allowing Exeter’s yield to surpass Andover’s this year. We love Exie! But now we have a problem because we really don’t have enough space for all of those people. In fact, almost all of the current preps will have roommates next year, which is TeRriFiC.* Although this can prove to be a great excuse for disliking the incoming preps, I have some ideas to make everything great again.

We can destroy Fisher Theater and build a massive dorm in its place. Not only will some people have rooms, but if there are a ton of doubles, half of the entire prep class should be covered! Sure, Fisher is not in the best of locations, but Lamont is nearby and some of the Lamonsters seem to be perfectly okay with it.

Alternatively, we could have the preps live in giant halls like in the military movies. Everyone can get their own bed with the incredibly fashionable E&R sheets. Also, who doesn’t want to wear drab military uniforms that separate them from others at Exie? Not only will the preps look the part, but they can wake up at 5am to work out just like the real army! So much fun!

DON’T PUT 70 PEOPLE IN DUNBAR. First of all, no. Second, NO. Just because we are the biggest dorm on campus doesn’t mean that we need to become even bigger! This year was already a stretch by having a whole 63 people, so why should the number of students increase? It’s understandably hard to assign rooms for the numerous new students, but please don’t flood Dunbar with any more people.

The Dean of Residential Life is going to have a lot of work to do in order to fit all of these people, but hopefully my feasible ideas will be implemented to solve the issues.

*Editors Note: I’VE HAD A ROOMMATE FOR THE PAST TWO YEARS AND I’M GOING TO HAVE A ROOMMATE MY SENIOR YEAR AS WELL. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT. That is all.           - Ava