Movie Review: Gravity

If you’re ever bored on a Saturday night (or any night for that matter) and you think it’d be a good idea to watch a movie, here’s a piece of advice: don’t watch Gravity. While we appreciate that many critics, including the Academy Award Committee, have deemed this movie “unbelievable” or “amazing,” we thoroughly disagree. Despite its nearly perfect rating on movie aggregator Rotten Tomatoes, an elusive occurrence, we are determined to change your minds.To start off, the movie does feature a lot of great cinematography and directing; the special effects are amazing and the premise has a lot of potential. Unfortunately, as the plot progresses, the movie devolves into a high-speed montage of twirly camera motions and Sandra Bullock’s heavy breathing and grunting.We felt that the characters were archetypal personalities that might as well have come out of a 70’s sitcom. George Clooney’s character, while admittedly handsome, spends nearly the entire movie popping one-liners and telling fake stories about his life during the mission. When he’s not trying to flirt with Bullock’s character, he utilizes his on-screen time by randomly hurling tools and parts at the ship in an attempt to repair it.We were also quite shaken by the sheer amount of the plot that hinged on Clooney’s use of a glorified jetpack to navigate the depth of space. Not to mention the scene in which Clooney manages to enter an escape pod without the use of an airlock. In addition, midway through the movie, Bullock’s character miraculously guesses how to read Russian and Chinese, which leads her to decipher the step-by-step manual for returning to Earth via “deus ex machina.”Despite this movie’s shortcomings, there were a couple of redeeming moments. As a whole, the movie’s cinematography makes it extremely believable and puts the viewer in the shoes of someone who is quite literally “lost in space.” While we didn’t particularly enjoy the long-winded shots of Bullock spinning in circles, in reality, this is probably what would happen if one were separated from their ship in the middle of a mission.We also really enjoyed the side-plots that were interspersed with dramatic action scenes. Not only did they contribute to the character development of Bullock, but they also allowed us a much-needed break from the constant and overwhelming presence of high intensity drama and the never-ending inconveniences that plagued Bullock’s character throughout the duration of the film.Though the movie suffices in holding the attention of the viewer, you leave the theater feeling as if you watched two hours of shaky camera angles and bad simulations of vertigo. As a whole, while there were a few dramatic twists and turns, the movie as a whole failed at keeping us interested. So if you want our advice, don’t watch Gravity. You’d be better off watching The Backyardigans or something in your room while your roommate does homework.