Exeter is Not a Place for a Fear of Discussion

Almost everyone at Exeter is scared of something regarding American politics. Whether it’s President Cheeto, forever-triggered Social Justice Warriors, cold hearted Conservatives, or loony Liberals, our dislike for the other side has morphed into fear. Now I know I’m not winning a popularity contest by being condescending and assigning labels, but I firmly believe that that the only way to eliminate fear is to tell it like it is.

Even if a lot of us are respectful on the outside, am I the only conservative on this campus who “agrees to disagree” with Bernie supporters and then proceeds to roll my eyes? Maybe I’m just the crazy one, but from my point of view it is all too common for us to make sweeping generalizations about the other side. In our heart of hearts we have to know that the opinions of one person are not true across the board, but a lack of critical thinking has allowed for a community of intellectuals to become fearful and politically polarized.

Both ends of the political spectrum are guilty of being hateful and ignorant as a result of fear on this campus. On election night, Trump supporters and opposers alike engaged in screaming matches, some of which resulted in pushing and shoving. Just two weeks ago I saw a flyer posted in several different areas of agora with Donald Trump’s face photoshopped onto a picture of earth burning in flames with the words “We can stop this.” I’m not even a Trump supporter, but I was enraged when I saw the sign. My immediate reaction was anger toward stupid liberals. I didn’t stop to think that this may have been the work of one frustrated person. And that one extreme sign doesn’t represent the exact sentiments of all liberals at Exeter. As you can see, I am guilty, too, of jumping to conclusions and letting gut reactions dictate my opinions.

There are steps we can take to improve the climate on campus. Instead of saying “I don’t mean this in any offensive way or anything but I feel like….” and defending ourselves before we even make our point, maybe we can just say what we feel. As long as we are respectful, we shouldn’t need to worry about being transparent with one another. The PC Big Brother that seems to watch over all of our conversations leads to a lack of communication and disconnect with those who hold different views. We also should not limit the discussions in which we talk about how we really feel to our closest friends. If we can change “I wouldn’t say this in public, but you guys are my really close friends so I trust you” to actually expressing ourselves to the other side, we can break down the barrier of fear that we use to justify our actions and generalizations.

I don’t mean to make Exeter seem like it’s a divided, negative community in which we cannot have civil conversation. In fact, I think that we do much better than most of America in terms of unity. That being said, we are the esteemed Phillips Exeter Academy, the school that teaches the “future leaders of the world.” While many of us laugh at that slightly absurd title given to us, we should aspire to live up to the reputation that we have. So while the entire country is grappling with the issue of living in fear of one another’s opinions, we should and can be doing better.

So next time you feel afraid to discuss what you truly feel or to talk to someone who is on the opposite side of the spectrum as you, try and put your pre-conceived notions on what might happen aside and convey your opinions while being respectful. If every student and faculty member can put in a real effort to communicate with one another and to stop themselves when making assumptions about the other side, we will be living in a happier, less fearful Exeter.