Best Friends, Role Models

When I lead the bright-eyed, nervous prospective students around Exeter on their campus tours, I always try my best to convince them that although the workload and stress at Exeter are significant, no one here actually wants to see you fail. I tell them that teachers have all kinds of time for extra help, your peers are always there for you, and your adviser will help you choose the best solution to any problem. Usually, though, I am just spilling words, thinking about the frequent essay conferences and the extra math help I requested once in my entire time here. As I look back on my time at Exeter, I am beginning to realize the truth of my own advice. Our teachers and staff members often have their own families, worries and stresses, but they always have a spare moment for students. For me, a few people have become combination parents, mentors and life-long friends. Some, like Ms. Waterman and Mr. Golay, I only met this year, yet they took incredible interest in my personal well-being, and have always been there to discuss or just listen. Some, though, have helped me to grow during the entirety of my four years here. They have seen me through every high and low and truly shaped who I am a mere four years after I stepped onto this campus in the fall of 2010. 

Ms. Rankin and Ms. Waleryszak have been two of my best friends at Exeter. When I began giving tours my prep year, I always looked forward to seeing that enthusiastic Admissions lady with the beautiful, puffy, gray hair. I got to know her better through many weeks of working in Admissions over breaks and giving hundreds of tours while classes were in session. During my upper and senior years, I began to frequent Bissell House for long chats about boys, school, sports and family. She listened intently and with genuine interest as I told her stories of things I normally would only tell my peers, and responded with a certain wisdom that my high school-aged friends simply do not yet posses. I also met Ms. Rankin during my prep year, when I had her for two terms of bio, where we clicked instantly. Her excellent teaching ignited my passion for biology, a subject I took prep year to "get it over with" but ultimately spent my entire Exeter career pursuing. We kept in touch during lower year, and I'm sure she became a bit annoyed with my constant stops in her classroom to inquire about Bio 470 and the Stanford internship. In Bio 470 itself, we spent many long hours alone in the lab together, peering into microscopes while I asked her about her kids and she listened to my complaints about math tests, the 333, or the impending college process. Both Ms. Rankin and Mrs. Waleryszak really helped me discover myself. They asked questions that made me sort out my thoughts, prioritize my desires and really figure out what was getting me down in the first place. They taught me how to self-analyze, how to ask myself what the root of the problem was. If I didn't get the boy, the award I wanted or school of my dreams, they helped me discover why I even wanted that thing in the first place, why it was important to me, and, given that information, what the next best alternative was. They have taught me patience, acceptance and appreciation for what I have. They have been my best friends and role models during my time at Exeter. 

One more person, Mr. Robinson, has really shaped my Exeter experience from day one. My parents had long ago ingrained in me the habit of setting very high expectations for myself, which has largely gotten me where I am today, but also often leaves me disappointed. With that mindset, that pressure to always do better, Exeter can be a trying place. I was incredibly blessed to have Mr. Robinson as my adviser. Little by little, he has taught me to step back, put things in perspective and to laugh in a time of what seems like great crisis. He always has an abundance of little anecdotes of past years and people at Exeter, stories that make me laugh even through tears, make me forget about my problems and realize that time puts everything in perspective. His appreciation for family, the wilderness and success defined by things other than your paycheck have taught me how much more there is to life than an acceptance letter to the best college or a prestigious career in a high-paying field. As I sat in his classroom one winter day, bawling my eyes out about a flunked 451 math test that I thought would jeopardize admittance to any college of decent standing, he told me, "Elle, the fact that you get to cry about this is an incredible luxury." Immediately, I felt stupid and arrogant, but refreshed. I realized how ignorant I had been to all the great things in my life. Suddenly the tragedy of attending what I believed to be a lesser school seemed so extraordinarily small. Mr. Robinson taught me gratitude and the true spirit of non sibi. If I grow up to be as happy, kind and lighthearted as he, I will consider my life a resounding success. 

I urge you all to think about teachers, staff or peers that have made a difference in your time here at Exeter and thank them. They define Exeter much more than any brick building. They have helped make you you. ♥