Academy Restructures Consent Training

By LAUREN LEE and ROXANE PARK

On Sept. 7, as part of the 2023-24 school year orientation, Exeter organized mandatory consent training workshops for all students. These workshops featured interactive presentations by HAVEN, a New Hampshire nonprofit dedicated to preventing and supporting victims of domestic and sexual violence. Students were divided into groups of around fifty based on their class and attended sessions in various locations across campus at staggered times throughout the morning.

In previous years, consent training was typically held en masse, assembly-style, at times split by grade-level or upperclassmen/lowerclassmen. In contrast, this year’s small groups facilitated a style of discussion similar to Harkness in the classroom.

Director of Student Well-Being Dr. Christina Palmer shared that these changes were based on past input from students and discussion with the Dean of Students office. “We recognized the importance [of providing] messaging about healthy relationships, consent, boundary setting and learning about available resources as the school year begins,” Palmer said. “Having this training is about providing the right tools, and language for our community members to feel safe and respected, and be a community of care.”

Students affirmed the importance of effective consent training at school. “It’s essential for students to be educated on this subject to understand the significance of consent in relationships and to promote a safe environment for everyone at PEA,” upper Nicholas Li said.

“I definitely think that the training is important and I like that it’s mandatory,” upper Sophia Jia echoed. “I also liked how they covered the age of consent in various situations, like if your partner lives in a different state. I think that for a lot of the scenarios they talked about, even though they’re very common, it isn’t common knowledge whether it’s consensual or not.”

As a new student at the Academy, prep Grace Yang recalled encountering new information through the training. “I thought in certain instances consent was assumed, but I learned that without clear consent it’s not okay,” Yang said.

Across the board, students felt the small groups enabled open discussions and ensured everyone’s voice was heard, contributing to a more nuanced understanding of the topics discussed.

“I liked that it was in the Mayer auditorium this year, that it was in smaller groups...It was incredibly different [from previous years], and I appreciated that difference significantly,” senior Defne Koyluoglu said. 

Jia agreed. “When you’re sitting there and there are two hundred people next to you, you don’t want to raise your hand. Even though the silence is awkward, you don’t want to be the one who speaks up. But in a room of fifty people, it felt a lot more comfortable raising your hand and asking or answering questions.”

The smaller groups also served to increase some students’ ability to absorb the information. “I liked that the groups were smaller because it allowed me to focus better,” upper Pranavia Vedula said. “Last year there were so many people and sometimes people would make disruptive comments or snide remarks. The smaller environments were more productive.”

On the other hand, many returning students noted that the presentation consisted of the same content as the years before. “The training was mostly a refresher of the things we learned last year,” lower Tiffany Sun said. “I felt like it was useful, but I didn’t really learn anything I didn’t already know.”

“I know the Academy’s heart is in the right place, and that consent is an extremely important topic. However, there was nothing introduced that anybody in the audience hadn’t learned in middle or high school already,” upper Ben Soriano said. 

“While the smaller groups made it feel more like a discussion and made answering questions easier, it was difficult to truly engage with repetitive material that frankly took up time from our day that could have been spent doing something more enjoyable. I believe that most of what was said could have been condensed into a much smaller ten to fifteen minute talk,” Soriano continued.

Jia mentioned another area that could use improvement, citing the slideshow in which students were asked to guess whether a scenario depicted incomplete or complete consent. “Only the first one was yes and every one after that was a no,” she said. “I think it would have been more engaging and also provoked more critical thinking if they sprinkled in some more yes situations.”

To combat this feeling of repetition and unproductivity, students suggested that workshops in future years could be more class-specific, expecting that older students remember what was taught in previous years and allowing them to build on their existing knowledge. However, new students from all backgrounds come to Exeter every year, meaning that the administration would need to strike a balance between ensuring all students are educated on basic consent, while also introducing new material. 

While many agree that the consent training was a valuable experience, this is only the start of planned activities that aim to educate students on healthy relationships. Among these, as Dr. Palmer mentioned, are the required Health and Human Development classes that students take every year, a winter assembly on boundaries, the now annual “Take Back the Night” event coordinated with Exonians Against Sexual Assault (EASA) in the spring, and an upcoming exhibit in the Lamont Gallery.