Academy Hosts Families for Family Weekend

By ANGELA HE, LILY RAMPE, KEVIN THANT, and ANDREW YANG

Every October, Exeter’s Family Weekend invites families of current students to witness their Exonians in action at the Academy. This year, on Oct. 18 and 19, families arrived on campus, some even hailing from overseas, to attend students’ classes, sports games, and extracurricular activities. Families came with the hope of experiencing a day in the life of their students and spending valuable time with them over the weekend. For administration, this meant accommodating almost twice the number of people on campus. Students and instructors noted changes across campus and wondered if Family Weekend realistically reflects a day in the life of an Exonian. 

Associate Director of Family Engagement and Giving Caroline Rouillard explained, “The community doesn’t stop with students, faculty, and staff. It extends to the families who are sending their children here. Every year, it’s always so wonderful to get families back on campus to experience a day in the life of an Exeter student. We routinely hear from parents and families that their favorite thing is going to class. Even if they’re not fully understanding what’s being talked about around the Harkness table, seeing that in action is one of the coolest things for them.”

Families are often most excited about attending their children’s classes since it offers a rare glimpse into Exeter’s unique academic experience. Lower Alex Lim’s brother, Charlie Lim, commented, “I think sitting in the class [was] my favorite thing to do because you never really get to see your sibling at Exeter interact with other classmates in an academic environment — with the teacher as well.”

Some students, however, questioned the validity of Harkness discussions with parents in the room. “I’m anxious about my performance at the table because my parents are in the room,” said lower Melia Thibault. “Not only that but to do well in front of other parents.” 

“It’s elevated,” Instructor in English David Rhee said when asked about the atmosphere in class. “You can’t get past the fact that there are people in the room, and they are not only your parents, but other people’s parents too.” 

Instructor in History Sally Komarek described, “It changes every year depending on the students and their relationship with their families. I’ve had classes going on as normal with students participating in the same fashion that they typically do, but I’ve also had times when students who typically seem very comfortable sharing their ideas at the table, all of a sudden get really nervous and hesitant and are reluctant to participate. Then a student who maybe hasn’t spoken in a few weeks might take over and play a very prominent role in the discussion.”

However, more talking and performance pressure doesn’t change a Harkness discussion’s difficulty or efficiency in helping students grasp class concepts, Rhee said. “If parents are there and the kids are trying harder and whatnot, does that mean it’s not a Harkness discussion anymore? No.” 

For Exeter’s administration, Family Weekend prsented a large planning task. Staff needed to coordinate everything from dining accommodations to registration setups. Director of Facilities Mark Leighton commented that preparation began far in advance. “There’s a tremendous amount of planning in FM to support the numerous events that occur over the weekend,” he stated. “Planning starts weeks in advance and is led internally by Connie Simmons but eventually involves managers and staff in each department in Facilities Management.”

The goal was to give parents an authentic, though polished, view of PEA. “We begin by identifying the spaces we’ll need for various events, whether dining areas or forums. We also handle ordering supplies, ensuring catering has the necessary staff and equipment, and coordinating with Facilities. We work closely with the Dean of Students to build the program, which runs all day Friday and into Saturday,” explained Program Manager of Family Engagement and Giving Janet Johnson.

One of the main logistical challenges during Family Weekend this year was accommodating the large influx of families and students without a second dining hall. Johnson explained how this affected dining arrangements, particularly on Friday, the busiest day for meals. “The biggest challenge this year was not having Wetherell [Dining Hall], which impacted how we planned to feed everyone, especially on Friday. We worked closely with Facilities and Dining Services to ensure we had enough seating and weather protection.”

Rouillard added, “Not having the new dining hall ready is probably the biggest challenge, particularly for the dining staff. They’ve had to pivot a lot to figure out how we’re gonna feed a lot of additional people.”

“A second tent was rented to support dining services and placed in the academic quad behind the Academy Center,” Leighton continued, explaining that other methods to accommodate the visitors were “extra folding chairs placed in each academic building so visitors can use them to attend classes.”

Overall, students and faculty feel that the continuing tradition of Family Weekend is an important event. “I think it’s very important,” A. Lim said, “because, even though it’s at the beginning of the school year, I feel like Exeter students should have the opportunity to see their family, especially the preps.”

Luo added, “It is really important for the Exeter experience because Exeter is a boarding school and parents have little contact with the school. I feel like Family Weekend is a really nice chance for both parents to have a peek through their students’ life at school.” 

“I think it’s really valuable,” concluded Komarek. “It comes at a nice part of the term. For a lot of kids, it’s their first time away from home and this can be a valuable time to just slow down and check in. So I think it is a helpful pause to come together and check in with students, families, and advisors. It is necessary and helpful in building a community.”