Now That We're Men Sparks Discussion

In three separate sessions, students and faculty gathered in the Goel Mainstage Theater to watch Katie Capiello’s play Now That We’re Men. The required production focused on issues such as toxic masculinity and rape culture. The following day, during Department Meeting, advising groups discussed and interpreted the play.

The idea of bringing Now That We’re Men to Phillips Exeter Academy originated as a result of a protest outside Jeremiah Smith Hall last spring. The protest, in response to the perceived mishandling of sexual assault issues, sparked much discussion on campus. 

“I know that a lot of the students who started the protest collaborated with Exonians Against Sexual Assault (EASA) to have…a town hall in the Elting Room where people could bring forth their concerns and ideas,” upper Maegan Paul, who helped organize the production, said. “A lot of people were talking about how there’s not enough going on…We have a lot of our health classes telling us to always ask for consent, and there is the affirmative consent clause in the E Book, but there’s not really enough being done about culture on campus.” 

In response to the protest, alumni who watched Slut: The Play, written by Now That We’re Men writer Katie Capiello, on campus in 2016 suggested that the school undertake a similar effort this year. Paul and a few other students looked into having Slut: The Play back on campus and discovered that Capiello had been working on another play: Now That We’re Men.

One concern about the play leading up to it, however, was how effective it would be. “In the past, some students and faculty have been resistant to required programming,” senior and EASA co-head Janalie Cobb said. “Some find that we have these required appointments and conversations too often, others think that the way in which they’re carried out are ineffective and too forced.” 

Organizers were also aware that the play represented toxic masculinity and tried to address the issue before students attended the performances. "I hope that, on the spectrum of maleness and masculinity…students and teachers can talk about the range of and the nuances within that spectrum, that we don’t pigeonhole…how someone who identifies as male can (or does) act,” English Instructor Tyler Caldwell said.

 Although the blunt nature of the characters was a concern for some, Capiello thought it necessary to write the play in a jarring and honest way. “I know that the language is shocking to people…and that can be hard because I don’t really want to turn people away or off from the conversation. But I also don’t think we gain much by pulling punches on the conversation either,” Capiello said.

By bringing in a show different in nature from typical campus discussions, organizers hoped that students would be able to engage with the material in a new way. “Discussions like this are seen as a punishment, and I feel like…when it’s purely educational, people won’t adhere to the message,” senior Blane Zhu said. “I think this is an interesting, perhaps more forward way of treating this problem.”

Some audience members noted that the play was much more realistic than they had expected. “I really think that it was nuanced, and I think they did a good job of like showing it through a situation that could very possibly just happen rather than something that I assumed would just be educational,” Zhu said.

Many students thought the actors accurately portrayed toxically masculine students. Though they are professionals, the actors were all enrolled in high school. “As far as I can tell, they’re all very dedicated and believable, although I think there definitely is a reason for all of them and why they decided to portray a certain character in that manner,” Zhu added. 

On the actors’ part, much effort went into portraying these characters as realistically as possible. “If you play it like you’re a bad guy and you’ve got a hood on, then everyone’s gonna be like, ‘Oh that’s not me, I’m good…’ So the hardest part is not purposefully being that bad guy,” actor David Iacono said.

The experience of viewing Now That We’re Men fostered productive introspection about appropriate and constructive behavior. “I thought it was spot-on. I thought it did a great job, seeing the conversations I’ve had with guys all the time,” prep Ben Martin said.