Teachers and Students Plan Community Conversations

After Grill employees provoked widespread controversy and backlash with their “Make America Great Again” wall costume on Halloweeen, Principal William Rawson took swift action to outline a series of responses—one of which was set to take place on December 9. Named Listen Up: Community Conversations, the response will take place later this winter.

On Nov. 6, Rawson sent an email to the Exeter student body announcing a new series of programs aimed at practicing empathy and listening skills. “It is imperative that we emerge from the painful experiences of [Halloweeen] determined to learn from those experiences and grow as a community,” Rawson wrote. “Community engagement in the creation of these programs will be vital to their success.”

These programs developed into what are now known as the Community Conversations, a series of student-led discussions aiming to fulfill the goals Rawson outlined in his all-school email. “Thoughtful dialogue across difference is a skill and like any skill, we can always get better at it through practice,” Dean of Student Life Brooks Moriarty stated in an all-school email.

English Instructor Mercy Carbonell explained the importance of the event. “Any time a community pauses to reflect on promoting empathy is a chance to draw together and come to know one another in new ways,” she said. “To listen without judgement, to understand our assumptions within the act of listening, to shift from listening to debate is a revolutionary act, one that will allow us to meet those we have called ‘other’ in new ways.”

The student group involved in designing these Community Conversations works closely with Moriarty, Director of Equity and Inclusion Stephanie Bramlett and Assistant Dean of Multicultural Affairs Hadley Camilus in order to develop students’ listening skills. “We’re trying to get everyone involved in a really genuine way rather than through a series of activities,” lower Mali Rauch, a member of the student planning group said. “We don’t want it to feel forced.”

The structure of the conversations focuses on understanding others and sharing perspectives. “We honestly just want students to go up and share. There’s going to be no names, and students are allowed to anonymously share their stories completely from their point of view,” lower and fellow group member Emma Chen said.

Although the community conversations were initially planned in response to the protests sparked by the costume, the program plans to prepare students for topics beyond the specific incident. “This is not a direct response to the Grill protests and it’s not going to be focused on the protests, but we hope that the skills that this teaches students can be applied when we’re thinking about future issues,” Rauch said.

These community conversations were planned not with the intention to reach a consensus on topics, but rather to create a common listening space. “It’s not really forcing people to all suddenly agree, but to listen if there’s any points of emotions” Chen elaborated.

The first Community Conversations was planned for Dec. 9, but they were postponed and rescheduled for later in the winter term. “The reason we postponed it was so that we could take more time because this is really important that we do it right the first time,” Rauch said. “We just hope students will put aside what they assume about these kinds of workshops.”

The group further hopes that taking more time to perfect the workshops will allow for more student voices to be heard. “We are planning to send out requests for students’ stories[...] of when they were listened to, not listened to and how they would like to be listened to,” Chen said. “One of the major reasons we wanted to push this back was to give students time to think about it and to encourage more people to submit [responses].”

The student group organizing the programs also had concerns about the lack of engagement from the community in regards to the conversations. “A lot of kids are really quick to become apathetic about the workshops and not put everything into it,” Rauch said. “We want students to put aside those preconceived notions and just try.”

However, the group is still hopeful for a positive student reception. “We just want to have students open their hearts to this program to accept it,” Chen said. “We’ll definitely stress that you don’t have to agree with others’ politics but that you should empathize and be respectful.”

At its core, the Community Conversations seek to encourage students to develop listening skills and constructive communication by focusing on the value of empathy. “We think empathy is really important,” Rauch said. “It’s a value that should be taught whether or not it’s being practiced already.”

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