Academy Adjusts and Reacts to New Visitation's Policy

Though the Academy just implemented its new Visitations (V’s) policy on Monday, Sep. 16,  boarders, day students and dorm faculty have expressed mixed opinions about its effects on campus life.

For the first few days of the school year, no inter-dorm visits were permitted. With the new policy in effect, visitations begin at the start of duty hours and continue until 7:55 p.m. for preps and lowers, and 8:55 p.m. for uppers and seniors on weekdays. On weekends, visitations extend from the beginning of duty hours to five minutes before check-in. Common space visits can occur without explicit permission from 9:50 a.m. to check-in everyday.

Dean of Residential Life Carol Cahalane reiterated her hope that the new policy would foster an inclusive atmosphere at the Academy. “My hope has been and remains that we create an environment on campus where students feel safe and can develop healthy relationships and have the support that they need in an equitable fashion,” she said.

Cahalane said that, so far, the implementation seemed to be going smoothly. “Students seem to be living with it and giving it a fair shot,” she said.

Cahalane has reached out to Student Council for feedback regarding the policy and has gauged student response through constant discussion. She noted that while there are no immediate plans to enact changes, “using this policy, we will as a community identify what is working and what is not.”

Dow House dorm head and Modern Languages Instructor Amadou Talla said that it may take students some effort to adjust to the new policy, noting that in this first week, he has seen fewer students bring same-gender friends over. “I think the new policy will take some getting used to,” he said.

Talla continued, “I believe students in our dorm are less spontaneous about getting V’s with their friends from other boys' dorms who used to just come up to their rooms without having to ask.”

Meanwhile, Religion Instructor and Ewald faculty resident Thomas Simpson said he had “a record number of requests for visitations this past Saturday evening.” He agreed that some students seemed taken aback that they had to check in their friends whom they could previously bring to their rooms without permission.

“At first, there was a little eye-rolling among some of the students about having to ask for V’s for friends who, in the past, could just come over without special permission,” he noted.

On the other hand, community members acknowledged various benefits of the policy. Math Instructor and Knight House dorm head David Huoppi felt the new policy has helped foster a more home-like environment in the dorm. “At their homes away from school, their families may have rules about when friends can come over and if that is allowed when no one is home,” he said. “The new Visitations policy lines up with this in that in-room visitations are only permitted during duty hours when the dorm faculty are home.”

Huoppi also noted that the policy promoted more time spent in common spaces, which he felt strengthened the dorm’s sense of community. “I have also noticed many more students spending time in the common room at all times of the day, which I think is a huge plus.”

Simpson, although he acknowledged the challenges of the transition, nonetheless praised the policy for promoting a more inclusive dorm environment. “What's really welcome about the change, from my perspective, is that we're making strides toward real equity in the visitation process, in a way that will make students of all genders feel more genuinely at home in our residential communities,” he said.

However, other community members have questioned the purpose of the V’s policy as well as it's effectiveness.

Prep Jayden Adams has felt inconvenienced by the visitations hours. “It’s at the worst time possible. A lot of people have club meetings from 7 p.m. to 8 p.m. and so a lot of times people really can’t get V’s or have to choose one,” he said. “What do you do when you want to hang with a friend you don’t see during the day but have a club at the same time? It creates a real issue in terms of time and getting things done.”

Upper Avery Napier, who co-created a survey over the summer after the new policy was announced, said that many students felt that the new policy limited their ability to forge close relationships outside of their dorms. “People are also concerned that their overall happiness at Exeter will decline because of their newly limited social interactions and friendships, which in my opinion is a very important aspect of life at Exeter,” she said.

Napier added that while she had not yet found any specific suggestions for improvement in the responses, many students seemed to prefer the previous V’s policy.

Meanwhile, speaking on effectiveness, senior Josh Tang said that regardless of the policy itself, some students will always violate regulations. “The effectiveness of this new V’s policy will be as effective as the previous one. People will always find a way to circumvent and break the rules,” he said. “There is no reason to think that people won’t do the same with this V’s policy, too.”

Senior Maddie Machado added that students may feel more comfortable breaking the new addition to the policy and continue their old ways. “One of the major unintended consequences is that older students feel ‘entitled’ to illegal V’s with same-sex friends because that’s how it’s always been,” she said. “This [relaxed] attitude towards breaking an important rule is influencing the mindset of younger students as well. I think it will take several years before getting V’s with a same-sex friend will become normalized.”

Meanwhile, senior and day student proctor Rianna Parla felt that the policy did not institute any significant changes on campus culture other than broadening the range of punishable actions. “The only thing the new V’s policy has done is cause everyone on campus to be mad at the people who made it,” she said. “Most of my friends have already gotten illegal V’s, so more people are just going to end up getting punished for something pointless.”

In addition, students have raised more specific concerns regarding the policy. For one, students have raised concerns regarding the new ban on sleepovers.

Lower Kiesse Nanor was left conflicted and feeling isolated by this change. “I’m the only black lower in my dorm, and I know that this is the case for a lot of black girls my age on campus.” Under the old policy, Nanor had sleepovers and the opportunity to connect with black friends over shared experiences but now finds fewer spaces to bond with them. “I get that there are other places where people of color can connect, and I know this is selfish, but it won’t be the same.”

Day student proctor and senior Paula Perez-Glassner agreed with Nanor, recounting how crucial sleepovers were to forming relationships during her first years at Exeter. “My lower year I was sleeping over in my friends’ rooms almost every single weekend (in various dorms) and it really helped me become very close to those friends.”

In addition, some day students expressed that the policy did not adequately consider their unique social dynamic.

Because day students are now only permitted unrestricted visitations in their affiliate dorms, many expressed concerns that they did not have friend groups centered in one dorm. “One of the things that the new policy doesn’t take into account is that day students often don’t have concentrated friend groups within a single dorm, unlike boarders,” Machado said. “We may have friends across many different dorms that makes it hard to choose or adapt to a single affiliate dorm.”

Senior and day student proctor John Morris specified that open room visits made daily life significantly more convenient and social scene more accessible for day students. “Day students know it takes a special friend or two to let you keep your stuff in their room,” he said. “Having a close connection with a few boarders can make you feel like you’re a part of the greater Exeter community.”

Parla noted that day student proctors were not able to choose their affiliate dorms, exasperating the problem of not being able to visit any friends’ rooms. “It seems as if day students weren’t even considered in the making of this policy, as usual,” Parla said.

Senior and day student proctor Sam Lew felt that this restriction and its negative consequences made getting illegal V’s seem more justifiable to day students. “Overall day students are struggling to find the ‘right’ group to settle, and [this] makes us feel more isolated than ever,” he said. “People constantly tell me that they break the rules consistently and have no care for it at all, and they will continue to break these rules.”

Prep Sage Murthy, meanwhile, said that while there were flaws with the current Vs policy, she felt that she should not complain since she had not come across a better, non-heteronormative alternative. “There is no perfect policy, but I don’t want to criticize the current one since I can’t think of ways to make it better while keeping it inclusive,” she said.