Uppers Partake in “Bringing in the Bystander”
The upper class engaged in a bystander training this past Sunday run by Exonians Against Sexual Assault (EASA) members, under the guidance of Director of Student Health and Well-Being. Student Listeners and other upperclassmen volunteers acted as facilitators.
The student-led training outlined new terminology, such as “prosocial bystander,” and gave scenarios on how to apply the knowledge to real life. However, the session received mixed reviews from the students.
The training taught uppers about the different types of bystanders in sexual harassment incidents and how to support peers in such scenarios. Facilitators presented case studies of multiple sexual harassment situations and asked students to pick out the role model.
EASA hoped to help students be more open in discussing sexual assault and harassment. “I hope people think more about what it means to be a Prosocial Bystander,” EASA board member and upper Janalie Cobb said.
Senior and co-head of EASA Grace Carroll expressed that the workshop offers a more thorough review of safe relationships. “The main goal of the workshop is to unpack and look at the nuances of experiencing or witnessing relationship violence,” she said.
In underclassmen health classes, Carroll explained, contentious situations are typically answered by simple responses. “The truth is, in real life these situations are always much more complex and much more difficult,” she said.
Carroll advocated that the timing and breadth of the bystander training made such conversations more productive. “As [an] upper you get very little training either on healthy relationships or sexual assault, beyond what happens as a school,” she said. “I really believe that these conversations are much more successful when they’re happening in smaller levels and then a smaller group situation.”
Students had varied experiences with the workshop. Some, like upper Aditya Gowlikar, felt that the conversation seemed “forced” due to “the lack of natural conversation and consistent silences.”
Upper Jasper Yu felt the conversation was ineffective in a different way, explaining that the workshop did not challenge his prior ideas about the role of a bystander. “For a lot of people it felt really redundant and not an avenue for new original ideas,” he said. “We’ve been told this lesson over and over, don’t be a bystander, and this is what a bystander is.”
Others, such as upper Summer Hua, felt that the training was helpful. “[The workshop] was beneficial to me,” Hua said. “I thought that the case studies and follow-up questions that the student [helpers] asked were really helpful in moving the conversation.”
Similarly, upper Alison Lennie described how students learned different ways of approaching relationships. “I think that the emphasis on gender roles and non-heterosexual relationships, along with the different perspectives of the students in the room, helped some people look at things a different way,” Lennie said.
Upper Tina Fernandez felt that her group discussion’s productivity was mainly due to her group’s eager participation. “People said what they wanted to say and their opinions were received with respect,” she said.
On the other hand, facilitator and upper Asha Alla commented that many attendees seemed disinterested. “When the day came, right off the bat, there were a group of guys talking about how they didn’t want to be there,” she said. “The tone was already negative at the beginning of the workshop. I received blank stares from everyone.”
Alla attributed the lack of discussion to inadequate preparation. “As far as training went, I received only one hour of training,” she said. “We were handed a packet of questions and [the EASA co-heads] lead a mock discussion that did not help me the day of. While I felt the training was interesting, it did not prepare me for my role as facilitator.”
Yu spoke to Alla’s assertion, reasoning that the repetitive nature of the workshop decreased students’ attention. “I think that it was noble to present us different situations and get us to think about how to solve the situation, but at the same time it just felt redundant and did not interest a lot of uppers,” he said.
The timing of this training also contributed to the disinterest. According to upper Sebastian Beck, “upper spring is a pretty strenuous time,” he said. “Grades matter a lot, and so [the workshop] seemed merely intruding.”
Reflecting upon her experience as facilitator, Alla concluded that Exonians must change the way they engage in community discussions. “Overall it seemed like a mockery of a serious topic,” she said. “There should be a perspective shift within the student body.”
Yet despite the obstacles that the training faced, Gowlikar felt that the workshop was still successful. “I definitely think that the main goal of the training was accomplished,” he said. “We were given specific examples of how we can reasonably help someone in an abusive relationship.”