Disparities in Wealth Affect Student Life

“When I first got here my prep year, hiding my financial situation was very important,” upper Sam Park shared. “Covering is a natural way of performing ourselves in society; while everyone does it, choosing the aspect of socioeconomic background to cover is something that a lot of Exete students do.” Park was also quick to note that Exonians do not simply cover financial insecurity, but the fact that they are “secure but not at the same level as their peers.”

They added, “The pressure was definitely there to adopt a more cavalier attitude towards money, to highlight and exaggerate the fact that you don’t worry about it.” While the number of students who truly do not have any monetary concerns is small, for Park, it did not seem that way at first because students “tend to display ability over inability.” They added that the image of Exeter as an affluent school “tends to draw people to [...] sacrifice personal integrity.”

“I’m pretty ashamed of the fact that I’m privileged,” lower Hermione* said. “It’s hard to talk about my experiences.” She explained that although she wants to share certain aspects of her life, she doesn’t want to “sound like another rich kid who just flaunts their privilege.”

Exeter culture does not foster garish demonstrations of wealth—the recent derision of salmon shorts being a case in point—but especially to students who cannot afford them, status markers are inevitably noticeable. “There’s not a great deal of wealth flaunting,” senior Luca Cantone said. “But [...] seeing people spend more liberally than I would ever think to do is a reminder that there’s great wealth out there.”

Being conscious of one’s status runs both ways. Eliza*, a full-paying lower, said she felt embarrassed wearing certain items on campus. “I felt very judged for wearing Gucci sneakers. I didn’t want people to think I was flaunting my wealth when I was wearing them.” she said. “One of the perks of coming to this school is that you’re going to have friends from different socioeconomic backgrounds. One thing we can do here is learn to connect with people from diverse backgrounds.”

When asked whether he thought Exeter was a socioeconomically diverse community, Cantone answered firmly in the negative. “I think our claim to diversity is hollow, because that includes rich people of color plus white people and token kids from programs like Prep 9,” he said. “Given our wealth, we need to reach out more to people who are truly down and out so this place can be a life-transforming experience for many.”

A recurring problem brought up by most students was the informal, unintentional friend group segregation based on interests and financial mobility. Senior Claire Theberge, a member of the Center on the Study of Boys’ and Girls’ Lives (CSBGL) who conducted research into financial aid at Exeter last year, said that socio-economic boundaries formed naturally based on who could afford certain activities in day-to-day campus life. “A lot of the times those are people who can go out to dinner together frequently or go on vacations together. It’s not terribly divided since classes and dorms are mixed but it can affect friend groups.”

According to Dean of Multicultural Affairs Sami Atif, the central question behind providing support for students of aid has always been, “What is a necessity and what is a luxury? What is crucial to an Exeter experience?”

“There are some low-hanging fruits,” Atif said, giving the example of food trucks on campus that have, since last year, provided an alternative to dining hall meals for students who could afford them. “I don’t believe the schools should invite hardship when these things can be easily corrected,” he said. “The school can purchase enough vouchers [for the food trucks] so students can discreetly pick up.”

In similar veins, upper Billy Menken thought that offering a $20 stipend for financial aid students, like Phillips Andover Academy does, would be a way for Exeter to “level the playing field” for all students. “When a more wealthy friend asks you out to dinner, I think it’s hard for students to say ‘actually I can’t go out because I need to be thinking of how much money I’m spending’,” Menken said.

So far, no policy changes or initiatives have been realized.

What complicates matters is that two students on the same financial aid could be from completely different backgrounds. “A family can be wealthy but with multiple children at Exeter and they may be on aid, not similar to the experience of a student whose family is not considered wealthy,” Atif said. There is currently no safe space exclusively meant for students on financial aid to discuss experiences relevant to them. Atif wondered what such a discussion would even look like, saying, “It’s hard to gather everyone together; experiences can be very nuanced.”

He further noted the overlap between socioeconomic background and cultural identity, which, according to him, are the “two biggest galvanizers, more so than anything else that makes people resonate with each other.”

Former proctor at the Office of Multicultural Affairs (OMA) Ratan Cheng ‘18 brought up how she found friends at OMA who could relate to her experience. “OMA was my support group, even before I came to Exeter, because all the questions I had about aid I emailed a student at OMA,” she said.

History Instructor Kwasi Boadi, however, cautioned Exonians against stereotypes which correlate race and socioeconomic status. “I had a conversation with one student of color about colleges and I asked her where she got admitted. My next question was, ‘I hope they give you enough financial aid and [...] she said she doesn’t need financial aid. That made me feel a little uneasy,” he said.

“You don’t want to assume if students come from Asia they’re wealthy, or if they come from rural areas they’re less well-off, etc.,” Boadi said, adding, “We do tend to think all white students come from affluent backgrounds.” These conceptions are most detrimental to those who need social support because of their socioeconomic status yet are afraid of showing it because they do not fit the stereotypes.

Atif conceded, “Oftentimes, when we hear financial aid discussions we have a particular type of students in mind.”

Since Park started their prep year at Exeter, there have been few significant changes in the culture surrounding socioeconomic status, despite CSBGL’s research and presentation last spring. “The assembly was subject to a lot of mockery which really scared me in terms of how I believed Exeter has gotten better,” they said.

However, Park understood that cultural change typically takes a long time. “As the real students here, we have the responsibility to make this change for ourselves. It’s my core belief that change happens from the bottom up not top down,” they said.

Park believed that the recent hiring of the Director for Equity and Inclusion, Stephanie Staten-Bramlett, whose responsibility also includes supporting students of lower socioeconomic background, is a step in the right direction. “Her existence is enough to help students feel like they’re not alone, and what I would say is I don’t want her to approach this from a position of power but a true bond with the student community,” Park said.