“Queer Kids” Exhibit Inspires Faculty to Share Coming Out Stories

Twenty-Seven photographs now hang on the walls of Lamont Gallery, each documenting a young person of unique characteristics who identifies as part of the LGBTQ community. The featured subjects, between twelve and twenty-one years old, are as different as they are similar; there are photos of individuals from New York and Florida to Brussels, Belgium. They come from different races and ethnicities; some dress themselves in torn jeans and heavy makeup, while others stare at viewers in self-made clothing that defy boundaries.

The exhibition, titled “Queer Kids,” will run until Oct. 21. The successful premiere, which attracted approximately 175 viewers, included a gallery talk with the photographer, Michael Sharkey. The Lamont Gallery has multiple events planned in connection with the display. According to Lauren O’Neal, Lamont Gallery’s Curator, there will be an Open Mic night in celebration of the National Coming Out Day, Oct. 11. The event will bring prose, poetry, dialogues and dual performances to the exhibition space. Last week, the Gender and Sexuality Alliance (GSA) also had their kick-off meeting there and several instructors, including Christine Knapp, John Caldwell and Alex Myers of the English Department, Photography Instructor Joseph Lambert and Health Instructor Elizabeth Hurley have taken their students to see the exhibition.

Spanning a period of ten years, the project captures the experiences of school-age students whom Sharkey connected with via GLSEN, a national alliance for LGBTQ kids in American public high schools. Inspired by the transgender community in New York, where he is based, Sharkey is committed to finding kids from diverse backgrounds, photographing them and asking questions such as “Where do you see yourself ten years from now?” His photos strived to emphasize the humanity of his subjects, and how they were typical students. On the subject of the LGBTQ movement in the US, the photographer commented, “I think the thing that gave this movement its power, the same thing that gives any civil rights movement its power, is that once people realize what’s happening, their consciousness is raised. There’s a lot of joy and empowerment in the raising of consciousness.”

Michael Sharkey’s photographs are not the only objects displayed on the exhibition walls, however. Upon being contacted by O’Neal, many adult members of the Academy decided reflect on the LGBTQ movement at Exeter. English instructor Mercy Carbonell wrote a poem about the formation of GSA, and read it out loud to art viewers during the premiere.

For Carbonell, who identifies as a queer individual herself, seeing students examining photographs and essays at the exhibition was a heartwarming experience. “Because of the name, ‘Queer Kids,’ they knew it was in some way their territory,” she said. Carbonell candidly shared about the difficulties she has faced in being a gay faculty at Exeter.  “If you look at the whole faculty, the number of faculty members who are out is extremely low,” she said. “While it has not historically been easy, the straight community has made efforts to be more inclusive towards LGBTQ people.”

Cary Einhaus, Associate Director of College Counselling, wrote an essay titled “Let’s Go Defense!” centered on the negative experiences LGBTQ people have been going through during the past decades, despite the cultural shift. Einhaus was excited about the opportunity to contribute to the exhibition “because of the subject matter and the arresting artistry of the photographs.” The counselor came out as gay during a meditation for National Coming Day in 1998. “There are more ‘out’ faculty here on campus than when I first arrived 20 years ago,” he said. “I was the only out male faculty member living in a dorm.”

Meanwhile, Library Associate Eileen Cusick wrote her personal narrative because she wanted students to feel that they could seek her out if they needed someone to talk to who was not a faculty member. “I feel things can be difficult for kids at this age, hopefully they have someone to be there and support them,” she said. Cusick and her partner have been living at Exeter with their two adopted children for sixteen years. “One of the reasons I chose to work at Exeter was the fact that they were open to gays at that time; when my partner and I were in other work places, we experienced difficulties with medical insurance policies, among other things,” she said. “When I took a job at the Academy they recognized us as a family.”

Yet even for these adult members, the decision to come out is not always easy. “It’s a scary thing to do not for myself, but for my children who have a difficult time sometimes to be comfortable in their skin as having two moms,” Cusick said. “I always feel protective and don’t want to embarrass them.” Similarly, Carbonell reflected on how she felt self-conscious as a queer faculty taking students to see the exhibition and teaching materials written by queer authors. “I was afraid of handling a situation where my students dismissed [the topic], as I was too personally connected to it,” she said. “The fact that I have been teaching here for nearly twenty-five years and I still have these feelings says a lot. That’s not something you would know by just looking at me. I suspect I am seen as a seemingly confident person.”

According to Cusick, however, the culture at Exeter has generally been welcoming for LGBTQ members. “The Academy has been ahead of most organizations and work groups,” she said. “It became clear during my first day of work that people would accept me and my family no matter what.” Cusick went on to tell about the time when she was planning an event on campus with some colleagues, and one of them remarked, “You will be bringing your partner, I hope?” Similar instances throughout the years had made her feel even more comfortable. “With families that don’t fit the typical mom and dad situation, the Academy has always been open,” said Cusick. Echoing these thoughts, Campus Minister, Rev. Heidi Heath, also a board member for GSA, commented on how current Exonians choose to express their gender, “As someone who grew up in a time when there wasn’t LGBTQ+ visibility in this way, it’s incredible to see these bold, beautiful students living life with authenticity.” Reverend Heath came to Phillips Exeter three years ago, when her spouse, Reverend Emily became Minister of the local Congregational Church.

Alex Myers, an instructor of English who identifies as transgender, reflected on his own experience as a teenager at Exeter and stated that “when I was a student here, there were lots of small moments and a few big ones, of activism on campus.” While he acknowledged the great encouragement from the community, he also felt as if “sometimes the support isn’t really active, but more of a passive—go ahead, do what you want to, I won’t stand in your way.” Similarly, Carbonell said, “Our campus is not particularly strong in terms of activism; we talk a lot about things, but seldom do we actually mobilize and take action.”

When faculty members were asked about if they had seen changes on campus as it relates to queer visibility, the answer was a resounding and enthusiastic “yes.” Myers commented on this shift, saying, “Back in the day, when the call for civil rights for ‘homosexuals’ began, queer was very much not part of the scene. But, gradually, the movement expanded and included those who were ‘deviants’ and happy being so.” Knapp expanded on that thought: “I came here in 2007[...] we were not having the same conversations about gender, gender identity and gender expression.” Only around that time did the word “queer” begin to become more widely recognized as a way to express one’s gender. Now, it is an integral part, the Q in the LGBTQ. “Absolutely, the conversation has changed,” said Knapp.

Walking through Lamont Gallery, one wonders about the role this exhibition plays in the much larger picture of national LGBTQ issues. Since this is a project addressing the lives of queer youth specifically, educators such as Cusick turn to the events unfolding in the world today for a deeper understanding of the environment which they are growing up in. “What’s happening now in our country politically is a real step backwards,” she said. “It’s given license to people with very conservative views to say hurtful things and get away with it in some environments.” Einhaus, too, expressed the importance of focusing on national news to determine actions that activists need to take. Regarding the protests in Charlottesville, he commented, “While agreeing fully with news commentators’ condemnations of the protesters’ racist rhetoric and editorials about our society’s implicit racist structure, I was struck how news coverage focused exclusively on the overt racism of the protesters’ stance, with little mention of these protesters’ hatred of other socially marginalized groups, such as non-Christians, immigrants, and the LGBTQ community. I felt that it was critical to examine the intersectionality between racism and homophobia.”

While there has been progress at Exeter, as in other places in America, further actions need to be taken before the community can be described as fully gender-inclusive. “I don’t think we are intersectional as I’d like to see us be,” said Carbonell. “For instance, most faculty who came out are white. I’m curious to know whether students of color who are not straight feel welcomed here, it’s certainly hard for them to find adult role models.” Meanwhile, Einhaus commented on how the Academy, in general, tends to only touch upon “issues of diversity that are ‘above the iceberg’s waterline.’” He said, “We still have a way to go in addressing [..] implicit heterosexism in everything from curriculum to employee benefits.” Caldwell, on the other hand, commended the school on its recent installment of all-gender dorms, which he saw as “a powerful step in raising awareness around issues of gender and sexuality.”

Many agree that having exhibitions like “Queer Kids” put up in a public space on campus is a step in the right direction. “Every time something like this happens it makes it more normal, even if people don’t go they might see a poster or hear people talking about it,” said Cusick. Knapp took all of her prep English sessions to see the exhibition, after assigning them an article about the queer identity from PFLAG, Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays. “Bringing the ninth-graders to the art gallery underscored all of those values that we try to assert would be important for community life,” she said. “Some kids may come from communities where this wasn’t talked about, so there might be conversations in the dorm or classroom that are new to them and make them feel uncomfortable.” However, like many others, she feels that the discomfort is a necessary step in the learning process.