Get That Groundhog Back in the Ground!
By AVNI MURARKA ‘28
Groundhog Day started as a Christian holiday where Christians would take candles to the church and get blessings for the rest of the winter. The Germans introduced an animal, the hedgehog, to this tradition, saying that if he saw his shadow, there would be six more weeks of winter. However, in true American fashion, the US took this even further, creating a day dedicated to the groundhog, our version of hedgehog, with a broadcast to aspiring meteorologists and people with too much time, a classic American rom-com, and a large rodent with short legs and rough fur achieving quintessential stardom.
If I were this rodent, living in my subterranean abode, having slept for all of winter, I would remain under the dirt. Why punish mortal human beings tired of the cold or their teachers giving them tests every week with six more weeks of slipping down hills? This groundhog remains unemployed and has an accuracy rate of 40 percent.
This year, the groundhog decided to see his shadow, meaning we have six more weeks of winter. We are subject to more snow pelting our faces and frigidity invading our dorms. Perhaps, Punxsutawney’s time is over (he is rumored to be 139 years old), and it is time to pass it over to his children (Sunny and Shadow). Or perhaps, in a generation where robots replicate our writing and computer chips can be inserted into people’s brains, we must leave Punxsutawney and his legacy behind. Perhaps his one job (which he only does reliably less than half of the time) will be replaced by a robot or an AI machine, just as we will be too.
