This is the Latest in a Series of “Analogious” Articles.

  1. If Exeter’s peer schools were students at a (non-prep) High School:

2. Choate— Initially, Choate seems friendly. They’re sporty, for sure, and can be the life of the party. But as the years go on, the success goes to his head, and by graduation, you realize you haven’t talked to him since freshman year. They’re a divisive figure; everyone either agrees that they can be a jerk, but most think they’re the coolest guy in the world. So, most of the school is real upset when, during a football game, they’re rushed to the hospital with a “head injury.” Oooh, JFK burn!!!

3. Deerfield— Deerfield is, for lack of a better term, a complete tool. They think they’re as poised as Andover or as hard-working as Exeter, but they’re a distant third at best. When they can’t be the student of the month, they start flirting and flaunting themselves in an awkward way looking for a date. They think of themselves as a total player, a master of seduction, but no one, aside from new, misguided students, take him seriously.

4. St. Paul’s— This one’s crafty. They always seem to be doing something and about to get into trouble, like cussing loudly in the halls or vandalizing the gas station after school, but they’re just fast enough to climb the chain-link fence and get away.

5. NMH— NMH is always spreading rumors. Then they scurry to the corner and giggle while they watch the mess they’ve made unfold. Total drama queen. You always think they’ve changed and genuinely want to listen to what you have to say and give you advice, but that only means they’ve got you.

6. Andover— Shares all of your interests and is always just a little better. They’re the co-head of one more club than you. Gets that date you’ve been trying for months to get. You may be a star athlete, but they’re the captain. You both make callbacks, but they actually get in. They’re the A to your A-

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